Marrow Masters

Jermaine Reid's Spirituality Through AML

Episode Notes

Jermaine Reid of Georgia was playing a recreational basketball game when, all of a sudden, he couldn't catch his breath.   Jermaine had not been to the doctor in quite some time and he knew something was wrong.

Next thing you know, he was in the Bone Marrow Transplant Unit at Northside Hospital, unable to be around his children.  He was fighting with acute myeloid leukemia.   But it was a chance meeting with another patient on his second day that completely changed his perspective.   All of a sudden he heard a voice tell him, "This is Your Assignment."  

Jermaine takes us through his battle with AML, his newfound friendship with a fellow patient, and how at every step of the way, his faith sustained him.  He cites several Bible verses which rang especially true for him in his time of need.

Jermaine gives us several great pieces of advice for fellow patients, including keeping perspective and goals in mind - and not getting hung up on the numbers.  And he also talks about how important a made bed can be.

We close by talking about our guest's continued advocacy in this space, including a recent speaking engagement at Northside Hospital and going to college campuses.  

Resources

DKMS, https://dkms.org

Be The Match, https://bethematch.org

National Bone Marrow Transplant Link - (800) LINK-BMT, or (800) 546-5268.

nbmtLINK Website: https://www.nbmtlink.org/

nbmtLINK Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/nbmtLINK

nbmtLINK YouTube Page can be found by clicking here.

Thank you to this season's sponsors:

The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, www.lls.org

Sanofi: https://www.sanofi.com/

 

Episode Transcription

Peggy: Hello everyone. Today we welcome Jermaine Reid of Georgia. So Jermaine is gonna share a lot today, and one of the things that I am most interested in covering is Jermaine's spirituality. It is uplifting, it is thoughtful. Jermaine, first, we're gonna have you tell us your story, your diagnosis, your treatment experience, and anything that really pertains to the beginning of your journey. So welcome. 

Jermaine: Thank you so much, Peggy. I'm so excited to be joining you. Thank you for all the work that you're doing as well. Glad to be connected with you. Well, I'm gonna start by saying in late 2009 before I knew that I was encountering AML leukemia. I was playing in a parents versus teachers basketball game at my son's school.

And I played basketball majority of my life. And during the time of playing in this game, I couldn't run up and down the court. And that was a problem. I was like, look man, I know I'm not in that bad of shape, but I checked myself outta the game and I just took a breather, drunk some water and thought, oh, I'll go back in.

Tried it again. And I couldn't, I just couldn't do it. I felt extreme fatigued. And I was having some headaches, like some migraines, and I was never one to have migraine headaches. So I recall when I bought the highest dosage of Advil to try to minimize this headache and then some other things physically started happening.

And I told my wife, I said, wow, I'm close to 40 years old. I don't know when I had my last visit with the doctor and I need to go and have a physical. I went down to the family practice that I had been going to. They said that they couldn't see me for like two weeks, and at this point I was very anxious to know what was going on.

My body was talking to me. And I had done some research with another family practice. I went to that place on a Friday and they said that they could see me on Monday. I went back on Monday. You know, I'm not alarmed, I just wanna know what's going on. I'm not thinking it's cancer, I'm not, none of that.

They take my blood work, they do all the things that they do for a physical. They call me the next day asking me to come back down. They thought maybe they had done something wrong when they were taking my blood work and they wanna make sure that they did everything correctly. So I go back down.

They take my blood the very next day. I get a call and they ask me could I come back down to the doctor's office. So I go down and I'm still not alarmed until they said, look, Mr. Reid, your blood work came back abnormal. Your platelets are very low, and your white cell blood count is very high. 

And we believe that you might have lymphoma or leukemia. And you need to report to the bone marrow transplant unit immediately. 

Peggy: Wow. 

Jermaine: Now, I'm a little bit alarmed, but listen to what I'm about to say. Immediately after I heard them tell me this, I remembered something that I had heard years ago and I would think about it from time to time, but now it came up, in my thoughts loudly. And it was your first reaction to good or bad news will be the determining factor of your victory or defeat. So after hearing that, Peggy, I said, there is no way that I'm about to die. I don't care what this is. I don't know anything about it. I'm not educated on it. I don't care. I'm not going to die. That was the first reaction. 

Peggy: That's pretty powerful stuff. Wow. 

Jermaine: Yes, so now they did tell me I had to report, right? So I'm thinking I'm close to my house, I'm gonna go and grab some things. So immediately of me leaving that office, getting in my car, heading toward my home to get some things to go with me, I get a phone call from Northside Hospital's Bone Marrow Transplant Unit saying that my file has been reported to them.

And I needed to report immediately. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna go and grab some things from the house. And the lady was like, no, you need to come now. 

Peggy: Really? 

Jermaine: Yes. She said, you need to come now and no one under 12 years old could see you immediately. Now I'm affected because all of my three kids are under 12 years old at this time.

Now I'm like, okay, this is serious. This is serious. What I'm sharing with you is authentically and genuinely the truth. So after I get off the phone with them and I'm headed to the bone marrow transplant unit, many thoughts are going through my head and through my mind. And one of the things that came up in my thoughts was Psalms 103: Bless the Lord, o my soul and forget not his benefits. And I'm paraphrasing a little bit, forget not his benefits, and also that he forgives us of our iniquities and he heals us of our diseases, and he redeems our life from destruction. That brought me some peace. It was calming. Because my heart is racing. Okay? 

But I'm a person that had been digging into my spirituality before being diagnosed with this, so it was helping me get through this initial news. Then I called my cousin, who was a director of medicine at Emory Hospital and told him what I was going through, and he said he was gonna come to see me soon. Called a pastor friend. Just called a few people. And of course, I called my wife and all.

So here we are, and I show up at the Bone marrow Transplant Unit. They put me in a room and they start the process of the biopsy. And, I didn't know what the procedure was. I didn't know anything about how painful it was.

I didn't even care about the pain. I just wanted to know what is this? So went through that and they came in and they looked at me from head to toe. And said, look, you don't have any bruises on you. How did you know? When I look back now, I'm so thankful that I listened to my body. 

Peggy: Great advice. 

Jermaine: Yes. And most African American men. They do not go to the doctor to get physicals. And when I went to that first office and they told me they couldn't see me for two weeks, my next question was, when was the last time that I had visited you guys? And they said, two years. I said, no, that's too long. My body is telling me I need to go and address this.

Now listen to this. This is amazing. I'm concentrating on doing what the doctors are telling me to do, getting ready for the biopsy and going through all of that. And a nurse comes into my room and the nurse says, Mr. Reid, are you a basketball player? And I said, I used to play basketball in high school. Why do you ask?

She said, there is a patient on this floor that saw you and thought that you were a professional basketball player and would like to meet you . And I'm like, oh my God, I just received this news. So I would love to meet the person, but how about tomorrow morning, because I gotta gear myself up for this journey.

So here we are the second day. I get a knock on the door at eight o'clock in the morning. I say, come in. They push the door open and they roll in this beautiful blonde, white woman, and I can tell that she's been in treatment for several months and she introduces herself and says, I am the lady who thought you were a professional basketball player, and I wanted to meet you. 

Hear me and hear my heart. 

I forgot that I had cancer when I saw her rolled in. 

Peggy: Oh, 

Jermaine: I forgot that I was diagnosed with AML when I saw Stacy. 

Peggy: And why was that? Jermaine?

Jermaine: I believe that from a child, what your parents and your grandparents instill in you stays with you. And my grandmother was a humanitarian. And she taught that to my mother, and I learned it from both of them.

We were always concerned with someone else's situation or circumstance over ours from time to time, and I believe that it kicked in immediately when I saw her. So I hadn't been in the hospital none of my life. I had never been admitted to the hospital. So it was just a day into this thing, and my mind is still that I'm free.

I'm well, you understand what I'm saying? The diagnosis did not change where my mind was concerning myself and my well-being. Does that make sense? 

Peggy: Yeah. So were you more concerned about Stacy's wellbeing at that point? 

Jermaine: Yes. 

Peggy: That's what I'm picking up on.

Jermaine: Yes. I was more concerned with her and her well-being and we talked, and I told her when my wife comes, you're gonna meet my wife and we are gonna make a promise to each other to come and see each other.

And I'll come to your room. You come to my room until we're outta here. Even when you go home, I'm gonna be talking to you. We're gonna be talking a lot. And she agrees. And as she leaves, I hear this. 

"That's your assignment." 

I hear that in my conscience. That's your assignment. 

And you gotta understand something. People ask me now, to this day, did you ever question God and say, why did that happen? Why did you get leukemia? And I said, no. Because the second day I met someone that changed my life. 

Peggy: Hm. That's really special. 

Jermaine: Yeah. That's kind of the initial, and I think because of that foundation from the beginning of me being diagnosed, it helped the majority of my journey. That's not to say that I didn't have any struggles and I didn't have any anxieties because I did, and we can talk about those things. 

Peggy: So I do have to know, do you keep in touch with Stacy to this day? 

Jermaine: Stacy did pass away within a year and a half. 

Peggy: Awww.

Jermaine: That's the sad part, right? But she accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior.

Peggy: This makes me think of so many things, but one, you know, there are no coincidences, right? You two were meant to meet. Boy, the impact she had on you, and I'm sure that you had on her and she helped you through your journey as much as you helped her through hers. I guess your connection to God, and I'm just so wowed by that. We don't cover this very often, but I just would love to talk more about the isolation you went through and how much your spirituality really played a role in your survivorship.

Jermaine: Yeah, Absolutely. Let me do say this. I do still talk to Stacy's mom and her sisters and some of the family members. So we're still connected because I am writing. And I want to make sure that it was okay for me to mention her name in my book. And they have given me permission to do so and I really, really am grateful for that.

So now let's talk about. The isolation deal. 

Peggy: Yeah. 

Jermaine: I'll tell you, my job called me and informed me not to sign up for long term disability. They were gonna pay me my full salary and take my last six months commissions from the sales that I had sold and pay me that average every month. 

Peggy: Wow. 

Jermaine: Now let me tell you, my wife and I had a meeting with the doctor.

The doctor tells us about this journey cuz I go into a quick remission after having a heavy dose chemo. I go into a remission, maybe within the first, just over a month. I'm in remission. So now he's sitting with us, he's explaining different things. And the whole time I'm listening, but not listening, I asked them a question like, when can I go back to work?

And my wife looks at me and says, God is our source. And I needed her to say that because as a man, you know, you wanna be the breadwinner and you want to be the one that is bringing in income to take care of the family. And when she said that in front of the doctor and everything, I needed to hear that. 

Peggy: Good.

Jermaine: Although my job had told me what they were gonna do, I had the social worker coming to me saying, well, your job can stop the process there and you need to fill out this paperwork to get disability, like SSI kind of disability. And I'm gonna be honest with you all. I was so nervous about making decisions that could be like unethical.

I was thinking so ethically, if you really understand what I'm saying. And so I'm like, my job is paying me. Why would I apply for this over here? I believe they're going to keep paying me. Well anyway, I feel this peace finally to do this. So I fill out the paperwork and I do all of this and it comes back approved in a number of months or whatever.

And at this time I'm kind of doing outpatient treatment as they're looking for a donor for me. And let me skip back real quick to this piece. I never really got caught up in knowing the disparities within the blood cancer arena for African Americans and minorities versus Caucasian white ethnicity groups and all that good stuff, right?

I didn't know anything. The low percentage of donors available to African Americans. Because my mindset was I'm gonna live, like I'm gonna live. My mindset stayed there. So when the doctor had shared that, oftentimes it can be difficult to find a match. 

Okay. Alright, I got you. Put us on a list. 

So anyway, I get approved and I'm going down to the office there, the social security office.

I got this check and I'm still getting paid by my job and I'm a little bit nervous, okay? So I go in, long story short, I meet the person at the desk and I say, Hey look, I'm going through cancer treatment. And I just received my first check. I'm thinking you guys should hold this cause my job is still paying me.

And the lady goes back, she says, excuse me, I'll be right back. She goes back, brings another person. The person says, "Hey, repeat yourself, sir." And I told 'em what I had told her. And the guy says, Mr. Reid, we really appreciate you coming down here. And I had a mask on, like, everybody wearing a mask for Covid. I was the only one in there with a mask on.

And he said but we don't care if you're making a million dollars a month, you're entitled to this check. I know what entitlement means. And when he said,, this check is yours and every piece of money that comes to you on a monthly basis until you are better, you'll receive it.

I said, thank you. I went out to my car and I thought about what my wife had said in front of the doctor, where she said, God is your source. God is our source. And I wept. I literally wept like a. baby. And as I'm beginning to go through this process, guys, now I've experienced this isolation period, doing the isolation period.

I began to think about things that I was taught from the time I was little up until this point. Where it says that if you honor your father and your mother long till your days be on this earth. So I begin to have these talks with God. Like, wait a minute. I'm analyzing here. You said about honoring my father and my mother long shall my days beyond this earth.

Then I would analyze, man, I've, I respected my mother, I respected my father. I took care of my mother on her semi-comatose bed, until she passed away. I'm like, I did that. And you even said, Lord, that when we do it until the least of these, our brethren, we have done it unto you. And I would say to God, I can never outdo you.

So I begin to petition, if you will. A lot of people say prayer. Another word for prayer is petition. I begin to petition God. And then I came across a passage that really took me through, it was closer to the time of me having the bone marrow transplant. I didn't know much about the bone marrow transplant.

I just know that okay, they said it's a more successful outcome if you have the bone marrow transplant. I see. And I came across this passage, and it's in Proverbs. I wanna say it is, Chapter Three, Verse Seven and Eight. It says, "Be not wise in your own eyes, but fear the Lord and depart from evil for it shall be held to your navel and marrow to your bones."

Peggy: Wow. 

Jermaine: I had never seen that. I'm sitting in the clinic and I saw this and I said, oh my God, I've never seen this before. I felt like that was conversation between me and God. And God was letting me know, you do these things, you have a right to what this scripture says, if you believe it and you can receive it.

Peggy: Wow. 

Jermaine: And I started petitioning what I read. I said, wait a minute, Lord, I'm not wise in my own eyes. I reverence you. I seek after your counsel. I'm not perfect, but I've departed from evil and in you, I live and in you how I have my being. So with that being said, I have a right to what this next verse said. It says It shall be held to my navel and marrow to my bones.

So therefore, what you did on the cross, you establish a covenant through your blood for me to receive the answer to my prayer through this, what I'm reading and getting into my heart and my spirit and my mind. 

Peggy: Wow. That's, that's quite profound. 

Jermaine: Yes. I'm sorry if it sounded deep and long winded, but 

Peggy: No, it's, 

Jermaine: That is genuinely, that's genuinely it. 

Peggy: Yep. No, thank you Jermaine. That was terrific. Thank you for that. So gonna wrap things up a little bit here. What would you say to a current blood cancer patient and or caregiver? What were some of your takeaways from your whole experience? 

Jermaine: The first thing I'll say is this, to the patient here.

I know how hard it can be when you're getting blood work, you're getting just your labs in general, and it doesn't look like you are progressing. It doesn't look like the numbers are headed toward where you would like them to go. I've been there. You have to control your thought process on you getting better.

Get up outta the bed, do something. One of the things that I did, there was a tech that came in doing shift change around seven, eight, every day at the hospital. And I'll never forget this, my hair was beginning to fall out and I shaved my head that day and the person asked me, Mr. Reid, would you like me to make up your bed?

And I said, yes, please. Please make up my bed. And they made up the bed, and that was about 8:00 AM like I said. And after they made the bed up and they left, I looked at the bed and I began to say, I will get up every morning during shift change and I will let them make up the bed and I will not get back in that bed until the evening.

So I would say to you, get up out of the bed. Move in the space that you have. Use that space to move around. Do something, do something productive, okay? Every day. Because it's gonna require patience in this process. And I recall when that lab work was coming, or that nurse was coming to take my labs every day, and I had to wait to see what the results were.

I recall coming across a passage in the Book of James that says, let patience have her perfect work so that you may be perfect and entire wanting nothing. I started meditating on that every day, so it prepared me every day in my thought process to say, let patience. I begin to speak to myself, let patients have her perfect work.

And I began over time. Now I'm not saying Rome wasn't built in a day. You know that. I started seeing slow progressions. Oh my God, I saw, oh, that number went up. Oh, that number went up. Oh, that patience. I began to get excited about it. So I'll say that same thing to the caregiver. Be careful who you listen to before you go and visit that patient that loved one of yours because they need your support.

They need your head up high. They need you speaking positive. They need you speaking encouragement. They need you to make them laugh. Because laughter is good like medicine. 

Peggy: So true.

Jermaine: I get really excited about this stuff, so I'm gonna hand it back over to Peggy real quick. 

Peggy: That is just so great. And we, we hear that again and again, Jermaine. And I'm so thankful to you for driving that message home. And I really like the part about the caregiver because we know that well, meaning people can say some pretty callous, silly things that can get inside someone's head. So I love putting that on the caregiver to filter through that and move forward with their loved one in such a positive way.

That is terrific advice. Wow. This has just been really great. Let's wrap it up with how is life today? You've got a book. We can put information about the book in the show notes. And how are you today? 

Jermaine: Oh man, I am great today. I'm doing so much advocating for, like, Be The Match, and bringing more awareness and education to the African American minority community.

Just everybody in general. I'm not just being specific to African Americans and minorities just because I am, but mainly because they're uneducated and knowing about the disease. Just as I didn't know until I was diagnosed. It doesn't really hit home until it happens to you or someone close to you, you know?

 So I'm doing a lot of that speaking on platforms like at colleges. 

Peggy: Oh, great. 

Jermaine: Yeah, that's opening back up since Covid. I just spoke for Northside Hospital Cancer Institute, Bone Marrow Transplant Survivors Reunion last month. And it was the most phenomenal time that I've ever had speaking. When you get a standing ovation from the doctors that treated you. So, yeah. 

Peggy: That is very true. So you're giving back every way you can and you know what, don't minimize the importance of that education across every ethnicity. It's so important and we will include information about be the match in the show notes, and DKMS. So people can learn more about that.

And you know, now that Covid is hopefully over, getting on those campuses and getting those swab kits out there. That is such an important step to finding matches.

Jermaine: Absolutely. And the book will be coming out in 2023. I titled the book "The Assignment." 

Peggy: Really? 

Jermaine: Yeah, "The Assignment: A Leukemia Story." And it's coming from meeting Stacy and knowing that assignment. Like I said, when she rolled outta my room that day, what I heard in my conscience was, "That's Your Assignment." I was sharing that story with someone when they asked me did I ever ask God why? And I told them, nah, because of this situation, and I said that as she was leaving. I heard, "That's your assignment."

And the person that I was telling that story to that said, that's the title of your book. And I said, what's the title of my book? They said, "The Assignment," I was like, oh my God, I didn't think of that. Wow. 

Peggy: I can't wait for it to come out. We're gonna have to promote that for you, and check it out. 

Jermaine: Yeah, I'll give you more information. Right now I just have a landing page of my website is www.jermainelreid.com.

But look, let me say this last thing too, Peggy. Thank you for the work that you do. Thank you, Jon, for the work that you both do. And I said this to someone that was interviewing me last month. I don't really think you understand the significance of your assignment and what you've been doing over the years.

You probably get a glimpse of it, but I really want to say that, really appreciate what you're doing. Keep doing what you're doing. Don't let anything stop you. And it's a blessing to meet individuals like you all. 

Peggy: Aww, Jermaine you just made my day. That is so appreciated. We love what we do and we're so lucky to do this work.

And getting to meet people like you is definitely the best part of the job. . So thank you. Thank you for your time and for sharing your heart and your spirituality. It's something we don't touch on all that often, but I think it is so very important. 

Jermaine: Yes. 

Peggy: And continued good health and just keep doing what you're doing cuz it's making a big difference.

Jermaine: Absolutely. Absolutely will. Thank you very much. Thank you very much for everything.